Joe

Conficker Worm On Android Can Only Be Stopped By The CreamPuff Update

Posted by Joe on April 1, 2009 | 11 comments | Filed under : Applications

The Conficker worm attack on April Fools Day can only be stopped by the upcoming Android CreamPuff Update.

The excitement of the great features on the Android CupCake development path is now trumped by the pragmatic solutions offered within the upcoming CreamPuff update.


Ed Burnette got the inside scoop on this important and necessary update for all Android phones from the same anonymous spokesman that provided all those wonderful CupCake rumors as detailed on ZDNet.

Not only will it stymie the Conficker worm and increase battery life to approximately a week, but also include:

  • Support for the new A5DP Bluetooth standard, for realistic 5.1 surround sound
  • Tethering via Bluetooth and WiFi
  • USB host support for keyboards, external drives, and EEG
  • Root access available by a switch in the user settings
  • An expanded Android Market that allows developers to use descriptions up to 450 characters long instead of the current limit of 325
  • A new audio codec especially designed to compress farting sounds by 95% – THANK GOD

Unfortunately you will need to shut your phone off and use Styrofoam cups with string to make calls until Creampuff is released on or about June 9th 2009.

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1 Planet Android » Blog Archive » Conficker Worm On Android Can Only Be Stopped By The CreamPuff Update April 1, 2009 at 9:22 am

[...] Conficker Worm On Android Can Only Be Stopped By The CreamPuff Update Posted by Admin April – 1 – 2009 – Wednesday [...]

2 If you feel the need to know what I did on 2009-04-01 | Jesse Priest April 1, 2009 at 11:06 pm

[...] jesse-priest shared a link on Google Reader. Conficker Worm On Android Can Only Be Stopped By The CreamPuff Update [...]

3 DouG1: On Location » Conficker Worm On Android Can Only Be Stopped By The CreamPuff Update | GAB April 3, 2009 at 9:45 pm

[...] Conficker Worm On Android Can Only Be Stopped By The CreamPuff Update | GAB [...]

4 coffee maker April 3, 2009 at 10:55 pm

the Conficker worm seems to have failed to live up to it’s apocalyptic reputation, but that is a good thing

5 Silent April 4, 2009 at 3:04 pm

This “CreamPuff” update is still a very big disapointment, we don’t need a new audio codec, we need a video recorder and multi touch

6 Conficker Worm On Android Can Only Be Stopped By The CreamPuff Update | Android Electronics April 4, 2009 at 3:45 pm

[...] is the original post: Conficker Worm On Android Can Only Be Stopped By The CreamPuff Update Share and [...]

7 DMAGIC448 April 6, 2009 at 5:15 am

THIS IS OBVIOUSLY A APRIL FOOLS JOKE. THERE IS NOT SUCH THING AS A5DP & DO YOU THINK THEY WOULD MAKE IT THAT EASY TO ROOT YOUR PHONE? IF THEY WANTED YOU TO BE A SUPER USER THEY WOULD HAVE GIVEN YOU THAT FUNCTIONALITY OUT OF THE BOX & WOULD NOT SELL A SUB $400 DEVELOPER PHONE. YOU GUYS ARE SO GULLIABLE. MIKE MARTIN DOES IT AGAIN!

8 Rob April 6, 2009 at 5:57 am

Actually, the G1 hardware makes multitouch a little difficult to bring to life. The touchscreen basically would get confused if two cartesian planes intersected. Video recorder would be nice though :)

Cooper 9 Michael Martin April 6, 2009 at 6:10 am

It’s pretty obvious its an April Fool’s joke by GAB & ZDNet.

The fart’s sound improvement alone is a dead giveaway.

;)

10 Maria April 10, 2009 at 9:17 pm

I too believe this all to be either hoax or an April Fool’s joke that got a little larger than expected, LOL.

11 n0mad April 27, 2009 at 1:27 pm

You people are stupid.

Fart sound compression FTW.

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